Xavier Cross is Dead...

Mental health is a subject I take very seriously, and I hope that some of the issues raised in my story did not appear too sensationalized. It is very difficult to strike a balance between staying respectful to the subject matter, while still creating an entertaining narrative.

The events depicted in this script are "heightened" realism; they are in no way meant to represent people affected by these disorders or how they should be treated.

In the context of a modern thriller, I hope I have shown that certain areas have been researched and that there is a version of reality, behind some of the characterizations and dialogue.

I have tried my best to create a compelling story, driven by the extreme characters who inhabit this fictional world. Writing this has been my own form of therapy, and I feel I have achieved a greater understanding of myself in the process.

Look after your mental health - if you're struggling, reach out to the people around you. You'll be surprised how understanding some people can be.

There are good people out there. There are people who can help. You are not alone.

I think the test is worth considering (briefly), but it certainly doesn’t indicate the writer’s lack of appreciation for, or ability to write strong female characters.

I could not have written about Erica, Bonnie and Luna/Selena without being influenced by the women in my personal life, as well as awesome characters like:

Vrataski, Furiosa, Starling, Gunderson, Ripley, Sattler, Connor, Quinn, Tramell…

There are certain plot points in my script that I chose to leave slightly ambiguous. I hope there is enough information in dialogue and scenes, which explains the motivations and reasoning behind the characters' actions.

I don't want to leave an audience dissatisfied. If I've failed to elaborate on anything important, please let me know and I can add dialogue or actions to explain in more detail. I just didn't want this to overrun massively due to explaining smaller plot elements, when it wasn't entirely necessary.

Hopefully, I've succeeded and you only have doubts about the gaslighting part (intentional), but if there are elements that need further explanation, I can easily fix this with greater detail.

Sometimes, things are best left unsaid...

All of them – seriously, every single character in this is a part of me – masculine/feminine, damaged/healed, lively/dour, lonely/friendly, loved/abused, introvert/extrovert, appreciated/thrown away – all of it combined.

If any of the characters, relationships or conversations seem unreal or not genuine, please let me know where I can improve. I have tried my best to represent each character as a real human being; however, conversational dialogue is difficult to translate into text. I can and will get better with time.

Please also consider that some of the dialogue the characters say, isn't necessarily what I think about the world. I don't agree with some of the comments they make.

Also, Hemmings is an unfiltered asshole, I would never say or think the things he does. He's just the way he is. Bless him. I was going to reveal his first name in the last scene - should I?

Most of all, I hope you have enjoyed a window into these characters' lives. I've enjoyed writing about them, and I'm sure I have more characters like them, to explore in future projects.

There are many, many directors who have affected me over the years, with some very recent additions. Too many to list individually, but I will mention a few (in no order – they're all rockstars!):

Fincher, Tarantino, Harron, Aja, Rodriguez, Mann, Bigelow, del Toro, Soderbergh, Carnahan, Raimi, Seidelman, Spike, Wheatley, Wachowski(s), Laugier, Woods, Cameron, Kelly, Singleton, Byrkit, Scorsese, Carpenter, Miller, Ritchie, Lettich, Barrett, Wingard, Olpin, Gillett, Gregorini, Peele, Nørgaard, Zulawski, Snyder, Fuqua, Ramsay, Eklöf, Whannell, Wan, Safdie(s), Dowdle, Aster, Vigalondo, Kusama, Möller, Villeneuve, C Finley, Hyams, Meadows, Egoyam, Scafaria, Favreau, Nolan, Bier, Shyamalan, Marshall, Refn, Scott(s), Spielberg, Cronenberg, Landis, Krasinski, Forster, Yan, Verhoeven, Liman, Affleck, Smith, Hughes...

An embarrassingly short list of writers who left an impression on me. I need to read more!

Flynn, Black, King, Chrichton, A K Walker, Shelley, Steinbeck, Easton Ellis, Goyer, Shakespeare, Cody, Koepp, Tarantino, Nolan(s), W Goldman, J Goldman, Vaughn, Cameron, Shusett, O'Bannon, Shyamalan, Sheridan, J Anson, Blatty, Kasdan, Christie, M H Stone, Helgeland, Jonze, Coppola(s), R Johnson, Smith, Aster...

If I had to list all the brilliant artists I've watched over the years, there would be thousands of names here. I will mention a few (LOL), but there are so many more and I know there's unparalleled talent I'm forgetting. Thank you for enlightening me:

Robbie, Weaving, Saldana, Buckley, Taylor-Joy, N Harris, B Piper, Seyfried, Scodelario, Pugh, Anderson, Lively, Lathan, Blunt, Ferguson, Lilly, Laurent, Scott-Davis, Porizkova, Goth, Pike, Buring, Fierman, Foster, Burrows, Moretz, Ronan, Portman, Harkavy, Monroe(s), Donohoe, Kunis, T McKenzie, Henson, Biel, Stuart-Masterson, A Holmes, Rapace, Lohman, Adjani, Varela, Poésy, Nyong'o, L Wright, R Wright, van Houten, Berry, Kidman, Lewis, Forbes, Shue, de Rossi, Winstead, Kendrick, Gellar, Dawson, Gershon, Tilly(s), Birn, Hamilton, Weaver, R Jones, Theron, Fanning(s), Sonne, Gyllenhaal, Temple, Dormer, Bonet, Jason-Leigh, Moss, Collette, Babett-Knudsen, M Sorvino, Newton, Bassett, Chastain, J Fox, V Fox, M Fox, E Fox, Costa, McGowan, Ticotin, M Davis, V Davis, G Davis, Daddario, Witherspoon, Sarandon, Pfeiffer, Perez, K Stewart, S Stone, E Stone, LeBrock, McDormand, F Dourif, F Eastwood, Lopez, Mara(s), Paulson, Bullock, Kensit, E Wyatt, Johansson, JB Williams, T Welch, S Dash, Snow, J March, Polley, Fonda(s), Eleniak...

McConaughey, DiCaprio, Bale, Pitt, Washington, Kebbell, Elba, Patric, Lie-Kaas, Pepper, Rhodes, Gosling, Maskell, Orser, Neeson, Fares, Cavill, Phoenix, Rhames, Reynolds, Gyllenhaal, M Kelly, T Jane, W Smith, Cruise, Radcliffe, Malkovich, Jackson, Perlman, Reeves, Reeve, M Freeman(s), D Stevens, Brolin, B Foster, Kingsley, Bateman, Sheffer, Ejiofor, Law, Walken, Afleck, McAvoy, Dafoe, Glover, Eisenberg, Leto, Reddick, Aiello, Norton, Fishburne, Butler, Jackman, Crowe, Murphy, Pantoliano, Nicholson, Damon, Gibson, T Perry, Holbrook, Liotta, Cassel, Cage, Eckhart, Pattinson, D Johnson(s), Wayans(s), Candy, Martin, Bardem, Bacon, De Niro, Pacino, Pesci, O Davis, Irons, Stoltz, Hartnett, K Russell, M Fox(s), Hemsworth(s), Skrein, Dennehy, B Cox, F Faison, Wilder, C Cooper, B Brown, Ventimiglia, Olyphant, Willis, Yen, Statham, Yun-Fat, Chan, Piper, Austin, Bosworth, Snipes, Cena, Schwarzenegger, Bautista, Van Damme, Adkins, Stallone, Lundgren, Jai White, Fairbrass...

I have a number of ideas gestating in my muddled brain, and it takes me some time to separate what is meaningful and what isn't.

Disordered is very much a mixture of male and female energy and emotion. I hope that comes across on the page. I still don't know if it works or not.

My next ideas may (or may not) focus on a singular aspect of those two contrasts/synergies:

I don't want to be too specific here; there are a few stories I'd like to tell. They are all in very early stages of creation (in my head). I write notes frequently: ideas, scenes, conversations, themes. Nothing is concrete and they may change over time.

I have a number of ideas floating around, I'm just waiting for something to fully solidify and make sense. I have a strange fascination with a certain entity, who frequently crosses my mind...

Heard of her? She's a riot.